Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's blow job season.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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