I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
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