You made me cry and you don't even care
My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
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