Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize
