I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize
