Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
