And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
