living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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