Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
