Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize
