we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
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