Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
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