Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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