windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Randomize
