She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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