I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
My dick has a subreddit
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
