Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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