Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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