You're so nebulous sometimes
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Enjoy the penises
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize
