There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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