Everything about him screamed your future.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Randomize