from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
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Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
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We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
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