It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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