Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
You're completely useless in the revolution.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Randomize
