You smell like a Billy Joel song
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
