Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
