Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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