I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
