theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
my poor anus
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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