I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize
