Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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