Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
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