Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
