Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
