So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
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Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
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