come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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