All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
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