If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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