Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize