cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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