He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
