nut hugger
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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