Sponge bath it is.
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
