i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
this just has baby written all over it
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
