So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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