That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Randomize