i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize