I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Randomize
