me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
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