You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
